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  • Writer's pictureJulie Humphreys

Mother of Water and Fire

Updated: Jun 7, 2022

I’m washing my hands listlessly in the water. I feel the plant life and the coolness. I sense the breathability and ease of the water. I don’t move my hands from the water because I sense that this is how I need to be, this is how I am meant to feel. I need to feel things wash over me, easily, naturally. It’s not joyful or exhilarating, just contentment. Relaxation comes with the crickets, with a hammock, with a good book. It’s quiet. It’s peaceful. The only sounds I hear are the ones we have all forgotten about; breezes, rustling leaves, the sound of a spider’s footsteps on the tree next to me. A cacophony of sounds that is nature’s orchestra.

I crave this sense of stillness and fullness more. I feel it is a calling home, a signal. I silently wonder, why do I need to be a part of the world that yells and hates? It only makes me yell and fearful and defensive. But even with all of the noise in the world, the peeps keep to their trees and sing to one another, hopeful for their next generation of music makers. I don’t need promises or guarantees. But am I a fool to be hopeful for my next generation? For this generation?

It’s in the stillness of Mother Earth’s heart where I am nurtured, loved, fed, caressed, and gently lulled into re-membering where I come from, where we all come from. It’s where I re-member who I am. I feel my future pull more and more and I become restless with the space I’m in and the space I am meant to be in. Yet, I re-member I am no bigger than the grain of sand on the shore. I re-member that the light within is much brighter and more powerful than any darkness that dances on the outside, on the perimeter, antagonizing, spewing fear, fueling hate and disconnection. In The Quiet of the void I feel full and contented, even with so much discord around me. It bears little significance. This will pass. This will pass. This will pass.

It’s so much easier to feel and to write than to talk. Sometimes talking ruins everything. Sometimes talking becomes yelling and shouting. Expectations are placed. Frustration and irritation rise up. We interrupt each other. Sometimes we all talk at once and it reminds me of the idiot at the campfire, squirting lighter fluid onto the fire from five feet away, stinking everything up, reckless, ignorant, self- serving. The truth is, we are all safe around the fire when we light it gradually, mindfully, intentionally. Then everyone stays warm and has a spot for their marshmallow. There is plenty for everyone. There is no lack. No bursts of toxic smoke. No fear. Just easy breathing and connection and shared story telling.

I often put out words to the Universe for inspiration, for healing, for intention. Dear Mother, please nestle me in your greatness, your power. Awaken in me the memory of my greatness, my strength and my ability and purpose to be a part of the world.

In this space of relaxation, in nature, between the setting sun and the rising moon, nothing is forced. Being is easy. Doing is not necessary. It’s just a natural state of being in love and gratitude. I will return to this place in my soul time and time again. And the need to be there grows more and more. I am a spiritual being inside a human being. I believe we all are. Just as the water flows, and plant life grows, and peeps peep and crickets chirp, I need to just BE. Catch my breath, feel my heart energy and align with who I am meant to be on this planet. Trust Love Confidence Service Surrender.

I’m next to a fire, I stare into the flames, I close my eyes and re-member my ancestors dancing around the fires before me, celebrating, honoring and giving gratitude to all that is. They dance and celebrate as one. They venerate their elders, and each other. They cuddle their young. They are strong because they are awake and live as grateful beings. They take care of each other. They love each other.

I will not give up my visions or my dreams. The fire which resides in me rises up like the swift movement of an eagle catching an air current, wings spread wide, floating, watching, being.

We are being called to rise swiftly onto our own wind current of dreams and hold our vision of a utopia, of a better world. We are being called to enter the new paradigm as unified beings, with open eyes and hearts and fearless optimism. We are being called to re-member the grace and strength within all of us and re-member how it CONNECTS all of us. Re-member that the darkness cannot sustain in love and light. When we remain unified, connected and honor the light within each other there is no place for darkness to flourish.

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